Why this blog...

I am the mother of the three most talented, intelligent and beautiful children ever to live on this earth. I am also privileged to be married to the most wonderful man! He has added three additional talented, intelligent and beautiful children to our family! I have a job that I mostly love, a wonderful education, a beautiful home, marvelous family, and I have the privilege of belonging to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I have been greatly blessed in my life, but I sometimes forget that. So, I decided to create this blog as a way to remind myself of all the many blessings and miracles that surround me. (I'm also terrible at keeping a journal- so this will be something for my kids to enjoy as well.)

I hope you enjoy what you read. I would love to hear what you think!

Deanne

Sunday, July 27, 2014

Living with CFS

Luke has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome... but no, he doesn't sleep all of the time.

CFS is something that people know all about only if they have it or someone very close to them has it. Some people, including a doctor I have met, do not believe that CFS is real- or rather, they believe it is a mental disorder- not an actual physical disorder at all.

The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) says it this way: 
"Chronic fatigue syndrome, or CFS, is a debilitating and complex disorder characterized by profound fatigue that is not improved by bed rest and that may be worsened by physical or mental activity. Symptoms affect several body systems and may include weakness, muscle pain, impaired memory and/or mental concentration, and insomnia, which can result in reduced participation in daily activities.
As the name chronic fatigue syndrome suggests, fatigue is one part of this illness. With CFS, however, the fatigue is accompanied by other symptoms. In addition, the fatigue is not the kind you might feel after a particularly busy day or week, after a sleepless night, or after a single stressful event. It's a severe, incapacitating fatigue that isn't improved by bed rest and that is often worsened by physical activity or mental exertion. It's an all-encompassing fatigue that can dramatically reduce a person's activity level and stamina.
People with CFS function at a significantly lower level of activity than they were capable of before they became ill. The illness results in a substantial reduction in work-related, personal, social, and educational activities.
The fatigue of CFS is accompanied by characteristic illness symptoms lasting at least 6 months. These symptoms include:
  • increased malaise (extreme exhaustion and sickness) following physical activity or mental exertion
  • problems with sleep
  • difficulties with memory and concentration
The symptoms listed above are the symptoms used to diagnose CFS. However, many CFS patients and patients in general may experience other symptoms, including:
  • brain fog (feeling like you're in a mental fog)
  • difficulty maintaining an upright position, dizziness, balance problems or fainting
  • sensitivities to foods, odors, chemicals, or noise
  • depression or mood problems (irritability, mood swings, anxiety, panic attacks)
The severity of CFS varies from patient to patient. Some people can maintain fairly active lives. For most patients, however, CFS significantly limits their work, school, and family activities for periods of time.
While symptoms vary from person to person in number, type, and severity, all CFS patients are limited in what they can do to some degree. CDC studies show that CFS can be as disabling as multiple sclerosis, lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, heart disease, end-stage renal disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), and similar chronic conditions.
CFS often affects patients in cycles: Patients will have periods of illness followed by periods of relative well-being. For some patients, symptoms may diminish or even go into complete remission; however, they often recur at a later point in time. This pattern of remission and relapse makes CFS especially hard for patients to manage. Patients who are in remission may be tempted to overdo activities when they're feeling better, but this overexertion may actually contribute to a relapse."

Sounds just grand or what?!
But Luke's doctor is terrific. She has him on an experimental type treatment that, mostly, seems to be helping...

CFS is so very misunderstood by so very many people. I think it might be because those people do not see the day to day limitations. 

Most days, when you look at Luke, you see someone who is a bit quiet, someone who is concentrating on his computer or on reading the scriptures or the news. If you talk with him, he replies pleasantly, although sometimes without a prolonged conversation. 

You do not see the level of effort it takes to get out of bed on the worst days. And then, it is sitting, sometimes with his head down, just waiting for the exhaustion to finally leave. 

You don't see the after effects of conversation on the worst days... the inability to make the smallest of decisions for hours afterwards- when to eat, when to sleep- it becomes again a period of waiting until he can feel even a little more normal.

And noises, sometimes ordinary noise we all hear every day, can set off unexplained emotions or trigger exhaustion...

As you can see, even after living with someone with CFS for a couple of years, I still cannot adequately explain it all- one of those experiences you have to live with to understand.

So what is there in all of this to be grateful for?

Well, there are "good" days. Luke will not die from this- although it is not painless. Most of my family has been understanding to some degree. Luke is getting better (he now has more good times than bad)

Best part? I know that he will be all the way better one day.... it is something that has been promised to both of us many times by our Father in Heaven.

Now if I can only build my faith enough to be patient until that day comes...

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Captivated by Claire!

Who wouldn't love this cute little one?!


So precious...




And doesn't her mother look radiant?












And Dad looks so proud!


Beautiful family!

Luke and I are so very blessed!

The perfect first grandchild!

I was so grateful for the unity and happiness between Cassie and Allen as they welcomed this precious little child into the world. I remembered back to my own first child experience and realized the huge difference- my then husband was not so supportive, not even there in the hospital for long... and afterwards, not around much at all really. 

I am so grateful that Claire has such wonderful parents!



We are all simply captivated by Claire!








Sunday, July 6, 2014

July Fun!

Love my family!


What's not to love, right?

And with the 4th- I had time to see so many of Luke's family- we were able to spend the day, with Josh, at Luke's parent's house. They are such good people! And Leslie and fam were there for a visit along with Jared and fam, Adrienne and fam, and Jordan and fam... little Cassity is just the most adorable!

Then fun with some of the girls at a baby shower for Cassie- still not feeling old enough to be a grandma- but it will be fun!

Also got to watch my own little girl dance- ALWAYS FUN!!


Ben is also quite the dancer!


Pregnant women should NOT be able to move like that...
Also the granddaughter's 1st dance recital! ;)

I am so grateful to be part of such a FUN family!

 







Sunday, June 22, 2014

Not a Family Knot

I am now one of 'those people'- and very glad to be, I might add! One of those people who really enjoys family history, talks about family history, spends free time on family history, and has a declared hobby of family history.

So- tale of the week:

Once upon a time there lived a father, George Richard who, with his wife, had sons he named Richard and George.

Richard had a son he named George (R.) the same year his brother, George, had a son he also named George (E.).
(Richard also had a son he named Frederick).

Then things became romantically complicated- and thus the knot!

Fast forward to my family history research... I came across three Beadle sisters who all had the same married last name- the records showed that Victoria married Richard' son, Frederick. (not a problem)

However (the knot), ONE AND THE SAME MAN named George, according to the records, had married both Sarah and her sister, Margaret. Then he would have had 22 children altogether- but I know he was NOT a polygamous. This George also had 2 sets of parents. Ummmm.... yeah, obviously there were 2 men named George.

So how to untie the knot if you do not know the background? How do you untie the knot once you realize there are 2 cousins born the same year named George?

It took about 10 hours of searching on familysearch.org and ancestry.com...

I found and traced birth records, marriage records and census records backwards to Grandpa George Richard to show which grandson George belonged to Richard and which belonged to his brother, George. Hooray! One set of parents for each grandson named George.

Then, I found census records to show that both Sarah and Margaret had separate households with separate husbands (although both named George)- sometimes in a different state! So, definitely two different husbands but with the same birth year and the same first and last name. Then, a few census records contained middle initials- hooray! I could finally say that George's son, George E., was married to Sarah Beadle and Richard's son, George R. (Richard), was married to Margaret Beadle!

Knot untied, right? Well, not quite. You see George & Sarah and George & Margaret each had a daughter they named Sarah Jane- the same year! And the records had Sarah Jane as just ONE PERSON with 2 SETS OF PARENTS! Oh boy.... (or I guess, girl).

BIG SIGH HERE...

Only thing that finally untied this knot was the fact that one Sarah Jane was born in Iowa and the other was born in Wisconsin... 

I love finding the sources needed to make the records correct. I love knowing that I am able to make a difference in the eternal scheme of things by putting families back together.

I am very blessed to now be one of these family history people! If you want any help, just ask!


Sunday, June 15, 2014

The Blessings of Being a Father

May be a strange title for a post by the most blessed mom on earth, but after being a single mom for many years, I know whereof I speak!

Fathers are one of our greatest blessings! And being the 'father' is also a great blessing! 

I personally have one of the very best fathers ever to live!


Always there when I need him, always loving me no matter what, always ready to offer a hug or whatever else I need-

perfect as a father can be!

In all of the years when I had to be be both mother and father, I had this great example to emulate!

And now, I have a spectacular husband who cares so much for his own children and for mine! He would do anything in his power to help our children come to know the Lord- what more could anyone ever ask for?



I was able to attend church with many in my family today. My nephew, Zac, will be leaving for Indonesia to serve a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints latter this month. He reminded us in his farewell talk of the great love our Father in Heaven has for each of us. In summarizing a wonderful General Conference talk, Zac said: " Heavenly Father loves each of us- (His) love is there for us whether or not we deserve it." So true!

Our Father in Heaven is the perfect example of what all of us, whether father or mother or child, want someday to be. I am so grateful for the love the fathers in my life have for me, especially for the love of my Father in Heaven.

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Ten Commandments of a Happy Marriage

as given at Stake Conference today.

(note: these are based on the Proclamation to the World- from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints)

1) Repent- judge not, that ye be not judged
2) Listen carefully with intent of heart- but especially listen to the Lord
3) live within your means- always including tithes and offerings
4) court each other- do good things together
5) pray together EVERY night
6) meet a need- do something for your spouse every day!
7) speak softly and kindly- always build each other up
8) where possible, brethren, provide for your family
9) do the work of salvation together- temple work, FHE, scriptures, etc.
10) cleave unto each other and none else (except perhaps the Lord)- Nothing is more important than your spouse.

What great advice!!! I am so grateful that my husband already does most, if not all, of these things all of the time! Even when he isn't feeling well....



And I have been very busy filling out my family tree... it is amazing that after all of the years and the many, many people who have worked so hard to account for so many of my family members that there are still so many left to 'find'. I feel so grateful for the Internet and the resources available to look at census, birth, death, and marriage records! 

My family truly can be forever!

Sunday, May 25, 2014

Families Are Forever!

I love this truth! And I love that I will be with my amazing husband forever- as we both live the Gospel!

This is a flashback to last year... 

We had driven out to a family cemetery- so many wonderful people to remember.

Lately, I have been trying to learn about family history work. Today, I met with some success on my Grandma Opal's family line- found the surname of a grandmother and some additional great aunt/uncles... but there is still much to be done to make sure I have things correct. I am so grateful for the wonderful people in my ward who are helping me know what steps to take... and I am looking forward to spending some days downtown in the next couple of months finding even more.

I cannot imagine how hard it must be for my ancestors who have to wait to start forever with their family- I am grateful that I can start my forever now!