Why this blog...

I am the mother of the three most talented, intelligent and beautiful children ever to live on this earth. I am also privileged to be married to the most wonderful man! He has added three additional talented, intelligent and beautiful children to our family! I have a job that I mostly love, a wonderful education, a beautiful home, marvelous family, and I have the privilege of belonging to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I have been greatly blessed in my life, but I sometimes forget that. So, I decided to create this blog as a way to remind myself of all the many blessings and miracles that surround me. (I'm also terrible at keeping a journal- so this will be something for my kids to enjoy as well.)

I hope you enjoy what you read. I would love to hear what you think!

Deanne

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

is it metaphorical....

In leaving the temple today and picking up my suitcase, the handle broke- just snapped right off! Yes, the suitcase I have had all of these long years, the one my mom bought for me for the first time I went to the temple with her at my side... it's so like so much in my life right now.

With Eric being home more often Jon has been commenting on having too many 'moms'- ha, ha- he does! But that got me thinking that I really wish he could have just one dad in his life. He was too young to ever remember that, as was Charly.

Ten years at a school I absolutely love is coming to an end, which is bad enough, but I am also facing the prospect of not teaching the subject I love next year...

And then there is the ongoing saga of Jon, his health issues, his school issues (all related to the health/memory issues) and his worries over all these issues! New tests have equaled new questions but not any new answers...

Plus all the other 'little' worries that make life what it is- money for Eric's wedding, money for Charly's college, money for Jon's medical bills, money for- well, I'm sure you know how it goes!

So, if that broken suitcase handle is somehow a metaphor for my life, I'll tell you what I'm going to do: I'm going to fix it. I will find a way to fix the handle because I love that suitcase!

The money stuff? Well, it's working out. One example, when I looked at my paycheck this month, I noticed that the extra money I earned by doing attendance school duty was just $3 shy of the total for the wedding luncheon bill! Now if that is not an example of the Lord looking out for me, I don't know what else is!

Jon's medical stuff? Well, other appointments are scheduled and may lead to some answers- but I will hold onto Jon's attitude of: Heavenly Father knows the problem and will take care of it. Plus, with the Lord's help, Jon and I have found some things to help with the memory- so we'll keep working on those things.

The job thing? I've started over before, I can do it again. Plus I have some great friends who will help me look for options. Not to mention that I am sure the Lord knows where will be best for me!

And the dad thing? Well, after 15 years of raising these kids a single mom who has never been alone, I know that they have been blessed with many dads! Great neighbors who are willing to climb on my roof with them to show them the in's and out's of the swamp cooler or to fix a door or to dig up broken sprinklers..., an amazing Sunday School teacher/mentor who is willing to count them as his own, and the best uncles and grandfather they could ever wish for- but most of all, a Heavenly Father who is always there for all of us!

A metaphor for my life? Why not?!

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Blessings of a Sci-Fi Geek!

Tardis door I made for Jon last Christmas

I am definitely a sci-fi geek! -Just ask any of my children, especially Charly (she dreads
being seen with me in public in any of my most beloved t-shirts! You know, the ones with the tardis, David Tennant or a random dalek... Can't imagine why!)

My love of all things sci-fi (or science fantasy) began with my older brother, Dan. He was a great older brother for me to have growing up: kind, wise, and very much interested in science fiction! Dan started my love of this genre by having me read a little known trilogy called 'The Riddle Master of Hed'- great books! Then it was on to Terry Brooks' world of Shannara, JRR Tolkien's middle earth, Timothy Zahn's Cobras, Atari games, Star Wars, Star Trek, The Greatest American Hero (even cheesy was great!), Battlestar Galactica (the original with the guys with the great hair!), and, of course, Tom Baker as Doctor Who! Love them all! What a blessing to spend so much time with my brother, Dan, enjoying all of the wonders of imagination.

Then the joys of having my children... When Eric was four years old, he saw an
old cartoon version of 'The Lord of the Rings' and wanted more. So I read him 'The Hobbit'. By the time Eric was in kindergarten, I had also read him the complete 'Lord of the Rings'. Years before Peter Jackman's movies were ever made, Eric went to 'my favorite book character day' at school as Frodo Baggins (6 years old)! Yes, that's my boy!

I am also proud to say that I was the only mom who knew that Eric (this pic) was not being Zelda for Halloween- he is Link! I am that mom- the one who plays the video games with her kids and all the neighbor boys too. In fact, I am such a video game nerd that I actually beat all the neighbor kids at those games! But my boys love it! And all the discussions we have had over the years while playing have been a tremendous blessing to me!

And then there is my Jonathan... he is my equal when it comes to a love for Doctor Who. Jon had quite a struggle learning to read; between his speech difficulties and his unique learning style and learning challenges, Jon's reading abilities could not keep up with his love of the written word. So, to my great benefit, I would spend hours every night reading aloud from many wonderful books- 'The Lord of the Rings', 'Harry Potter', even 'Redwall'. So many years and so many hours with my favorite Jonathan and my favorite genre!

Being a sci-fi geek is not for everyone, but I can't imagine my life any other way!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

A step forward?

You know when the neurologist calls with the test results herself instead of leaving a message or having her nurse do it that it won't be the best news... I just wish I could understand more medical- speak! Jon's EKG showed something starting with a premature aortic ______, and something else about the other end of the heartbeat being off as well. But apparently it could all still be 'normal'- which I know, that sounds like the goods news, right?

However, after so many years and so many tests (MRI, EEG, EKG, neuro-psych evals, spinal tap, etc) that have shown 'something' but nothing 'definitive'... so frustrated! Sometimes I just wish that the test would give an indication of the root of the problems, but if that means Jon getting worse on his condition, whatever it may be, well- of course, I don't want that.

So this could be the beginning of some answers or the middle of even more questions about my most adorable Jonathan (and yes, I am referring to my going on 17 year-old son as adorable! I am his mother after all.) I will be praying that my Father in Heaven will lead the doctors to whatever it is they are to discover at this time, and that He will give me the patience that I can never seem to develop enough of no matter how much comes my way!

And I will try to appreciate even more the incredible blessing that Jon is in my life!

Monday, April 18, 2011

Inspiration from the amazing JRR Tolkien

Two thoughts/quotes...

"I wish none of this had happened." "So do all who live to see such times but that is not for them to decide. All you have to decide is what to do with the time that is given you."

&

All that is gold does not glitter.
Not all those who wander are lost.
The old that is strong does not wither.
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

I love this advice... just keep hoping that my 'roots' are deep enough.

Friday, April 15, 2011

decisions on the job front...

I find it quite interesting how the Lord prepares me for things in my life. This week in Sunday School, Gospel Doctrine class, I am teaching a lesson which includes the parable of the Good Samaritan. And this week at work, I am learning first-hand the effects of someone doing the opposite.

After ten years of sticking to a floundering district because of my love for my school, I will be leaving due to the politics of the system and the selfish choices of one person. Yet, I am certain that the Lord is directing my life and trying to teach me multiple lessons.

Many years ago, I had been providing daycare for various families while my own children were young. Then came the week that all three of my current families told me that they would not be needing my services any longer: one mom decided to be at home with her children, one family was moving, and the last family was having their grandmother move in with them. I did the usual advertising and spreading the word to find new clients but to no avail. I knew the Lord was telling me it was time for a change. Change I did! I soon found a job as a para educator for the special education department of Granite School District- and that of course led to my seeking a teaching certificate and then a master's degree. The Lord knew what I needed.

So, amidst my anxiety and hurt and feelings of betrayal, I need to learn the lesson of the Good Samaritan. As James E. Faust says in part of my lesson: "The Savior reminds us, 'He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.' One of life’s paradoxes is that a person who approaches everything with a what’s-in-it-for-me attitude may acquire money, property, and land, but in the end will lose the fulfillment and the happiness that a person enjoys who shares his talents and gifts generously with others."

I need to look for the opportunities now presented to me, seek the things that the Lord would have me to do, and actively watch for the chances to serve those around me. In looking back upon other turning points in my life, I know that I will be blessed if I do this.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Living my Own Life!



So this weekend, I had yet another 'friend' give me this advice: You need to stop living your life for your kids...

Wow! How short-sighted
of him. My life for the past 21 + years has been amazing precisely because of my kids!I cannot even comprehend all of the magnificent things I have accomplished in my life because of their presence.

I learned so many skills- laying tile, making quilts, doing electrical wiring of light fixtures, putting up sheet rock, refinishing wood floors, and decorative painting- all in an effort to make a home for my children. I went back to school, earning a teaching certificate and a master's degree, all in an effort to make a living for the support of my children.

I have been able to be a gardener, a seamstress, a cook and bottle washer, a taxicab driver, a driver's ed instructor, a piano teacher, a baseball and basketball coach, a cheerleader, a baker, a nurse, a counselor, and so much more (a MOM!) because of my kids. Spending hours reading aloud from so many books ('Goodnight Moon', 'Madeline', 'The Hobbit', all of 'The Lord of the Rings' [twice!], all of Harry Potter [twice!] and so many others was not just time enjoyed by my kids. It was hours of time that will always be priceless to my memory! Sports games, piano recitals and dance practices/performances are all precious time I wouldn't trade for anything else- for me!

And all of the Family Home Evenings, family prayer time, scripture study and gospel discussions- Life cannot get any better. It is so rewarding to be able to discuss our beliefs as a family. It gives me a small glimpse of what eternity can be for me.

Now that my children are getting older (two adults and one to go!), my life will continue to be entwined with theirs. Anyone who has ever had a child go on a mission will understand how I felt when I received the first of 'those' letters: the ones where your child suddenly expresses their appreciation for you in a way that forever melts your heart...


My kids are my life, the life I am living. My kids are my best friends. I am so very blessed to be able to dedicate a small part of my life to them!

(And to my 'friend' and anyone else like him, you will be very blessed indeed if my kids and I consider you to be a part of our lives.)

Friday, April 8, 2011

Jonathan, Jonny, Jon, Jonny-cakes, my buddy

What can one say about this most adorable child? Jon is my youngest and my buddy! He is the most perfect fit for our family. Always saying something funny, always thinking of new and unique ideas- then making them work- Of course, that can be both a good thing and a not-so-good thing... like the time he was 5 and decided he didn't want to leave his cousin's house. He and his cousin piled every toy they could find in front of the door! It took breaking and entering through the window to get the door open- sorry Kim! Or the time he (when he was not quite 2) wanted to climb on the oven, the old fashioned kind, and opened the oven door to do it. Yes, the oven was on and Jon got a third degree burn from hand to elbow! Or the time when he wanted to see what would happen if he stuck a metal key chain into the socket of a lamp... Yes, the lamp was on (Jon had removed the bulb) and Jon got quite a scary electrical shock! I guess with all the climbs, falls, bumps, bruises, etc. you could say that it's a miracle Jon has only ever come away with that burn, one mild concussion, and a couple of bouts with stitches!

Jon is a very good-natured child. Someone once pointed out that Jon is rarely angry and that he never holds a grudge. That is so very true! Now don't get me wrong, Jon has had his normal moments, some terrible two moments, some disrupting church moments, a few getting in trouble at school moments and now some memorable teenage moments, but by and large, Jon is a very laid back and happy kid. In his life, Jon has also had some unique medical challenges. The doctors have used several scary medical terms in describing Jon: dysarthia, dystnioa, foreign accent syndrome and juvenial onset dementia to name a few- and still no firm diagnosis. But Jon told me when he was about 10 that it doesn't worry him at all. He said, " My life is the way Heavenly Father wants it to be. So everything will work out." What a magnificent spirit!

Jon is very talented. Besides his talent with people- making them smile- Jon can crochet, cook, and, my favorite, Jon can write music. He hasn't spent much time with this last talent in recent years, but I am always hoping...

Jon is my buddy. He, by virtue of being the last child, is the one who likes to just hang out with mom. He enjoys many things I enjoy, including my love of sci-fi and cooking (his love of eating doesn't hurt either!). I dread the day, coming soon I am sure, that Jon will be too busy with his own life to spend much time in mine.
I am so thankful to have Jon in my life!

Monday, April 4, 2011

The Miracle of the Broken Water Main

The following account is true, all of it, and yes, you read the title correctly- broken water mains can be miracles and blessings!

It all happened during what at the time I viewed as the worst year of my life... After years of struggles, I filed for divorce. My children were 1, 3, and 6 years of age, I didn't have a job, and I was now solely responsible for the mortgage payment on a 100+ year old house. It was November, and I was having trouble with my furnace. So, I called the gas company to have someone take a look. In his wisdom, the gas company rep decided to shut the gas off to my house, saying that I would need to re-line my flue before the gas could be turned back on! Did I mention I had three small children, and it was November?! The repair would take eight days. In the meantime, my parents graciously consented to allow the four of us to move in to their home.

During this week, as I was trying to stay warm in my house, waiting for Eric to be done with his kindergarten class for the day, I noticed that the water would not work. Yes, the water main had broken! I got the water shut off, but after some digging, discovered that the break could not be found. You see, my house was so old that the city had moved the road after the water main had been run. So instead of leaving my house and curving toward the road, my water main left my house and curved away from the road to who knows where. The plumber told me that the least expensive solution would be to dig a new water main. (The trench needed to run 3/4 the length of the 1/3 acre lot!) I did not have the money to do this, and with winter starting, it would be springtime before my neighbors would be able to help me dig the needed trench.

The result of this situation was that my children and I ended up spending eight months at my parent's home instead of the original eight days. Living in my parent's home at this time were two of my brothers, my sister, my parents, and my grandmother. My children and I were able to stay in a room that measured 10 feet by 12 feet. It had one twin sized bed, a crib for Jon and a small dresser. Eric and Charly slept in sleeping bags on the floor. This was the arrangement for the first two months. Then, after my sister's marriage, Eric and Charly were able to move downstairs to a bedroom with real beds.

My family was not used to having small children and their resultant noises and messes around. Life was not always easy or pleasant sharing the house. I also had to drive Eric to kindergarten across the valley, wait at my house, with no water, and bring him back, leaving my mother to tend the other children as I could not have them spending several hours without a bathroom. Bedtime for the kids was also a challenge as my grandmother, being hard of hearing, would listen to the radio or her television shows at full volume on the other side of the wall from Jon's crib, not always an ideal situation to say the least.

At the end of the eight months, as the repairs came to completion and my children and I were able to move back home, my wonderful mother was diagnosed with cancer. This year of my life saw the end of my marriage, eight months without a home and my mother's passing into the next life.

So, why do I say this was a miracle? I have come to realize that this was not the worst year of my life. In fact, I count this year as one of the most magnificently wonderful years of my life. This year was full of blessings and miracles.

My marriage ended, but I have come to see that, given the circumstances, it was the best thing for me. I could not stay in my house, but I came to realize the generosity of my neighbors and my family: my neighbors for helping to repair my home, my family for offering me theirs for a time. Despite the struggles to adjust our lifestyles and blend our families, no perhaps because of those struggles, my children and I grew much closer to my family, learning more appreciation and love for them than we would have under other circumstances.

Driving Eric to kindergarten was an immense blessing in many ways. I was able to spend time alone talking to Eric every one of those days. Charly and Jonathan were able to spend time with their grandmother. My mother not only cared for them and fed them lunch, she would arrange for an art project or other activity that she would do with Charly everyday when Jon was having his nap. Although she was only three years old, Charly well remembers that time spent with Grandma. I was able to spend four hours each of those days repairing and improving my house. It was an old home that needed the attention, and by not having the children there, I was able to complete many needed repairs.

The broken water main was also, believe it or not, a financial blessing because of the generosity of my dad. For eight months, I did not have to pay for groceries (Thanks again, Dad!) and my utility bills were very small.

For me, personally, the biggest blessing and best thing to come out of this year was my opportunity to spend time with my mom every day. To have family prayers with her every morning, to talk for hours as we completed chores side by side, to hear her tell me that she loved me every night before I went to bed, these memories are so priceless to me now that she is gone. What a miracle that my loving Father in Heaven saw fit to allow my water main to break at this time of my life. It was nothing short of a miracle. If it had happened the next year, it would have happened too late. If it had not happened at all, if what I thought would be best and prayed so earnestly for at that time (a quick repair and back to my home) had happened instead, I would have missed all of those months with my mother.

I am so grateful to my Father for blessing me so abundantly, for giving me what I needed most instead of what I wanted. I know that He does hear and answer my prayers. I just hope that you and I can see the miracles that surround us every day.